Official Statement: The Triple Yolk Mush Isn't Real But The KFC Mush Is
So this happened this morning. I wrote a blog about it, ate it, and went about my NFL Sunday very happily watching the 1:00 games without a care in the world.
Then this happened.
https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/1447323429942738952
At first glance you would say the Triple Yolk was a sign of bad things to come, like oranges in The Godfather. However, I counter with this tweet:
So this is my official statement for immediate release. I don’t want to live in a world where a triple yolk is a bad thing but I already live in a world where a KFC mush exists, so we are going to go with that. You can make a case that the three yolks symbolize the demises of Saquon, Golladay, and sweet Daniel.
However, KFC has been mushing teams since before he even started at Barstool and I just wrote about how he cursed our beloved Mets this week.
So blame Kevin for this nightmarish injury outbreak, not the chicken unwillingly having GMOs thrown down her gullet. Dude wouldn't even cum himself and jump off a bridge for his favorite sports team on the planet. Meanwhile I'm trying to do whatever black magic I can to get the Giants back in this thing.
That being said, if KFC has learned to weaponize his mush and infect other teams, we are truly in our darkest hour here at Barstool.